In the world of literature, some authors emerge with a voice that resonates deeply, bringing forth stories that touch our hearts and minds. Today, we step into the world of Marissa Alma Nick, the talented author behind the thought-provoking novel “Rebel in Venus.”
Nick’s transition from a successful career in dance and choreography to becoming a celebrated writer is a story of resilience and transformation. Her debut novel, “Rebel in Venus,” not only explores the complexities of friendship and queerness but also challenges the stigmas surrounding women’s mental health. As we talk with Marissa, we’ll uncover the intimate details of her writing process, the personal significance of certain chapters, and the impact she hopes her book will have on readers.
Your creativity and contributions to the arts have not gone unnoticed, and we are truly impressed by your talent and achievements. Can you tell us a bit about your background and what inspired you to become a writer?
First off, thank you so much for saying that. I think we can all forget to take a look at ourselves and say, “Hey, I’ve done some things!” so thank you for that.
I think I fell in love with writing when I was a little girl, around the same time I was starting to take dance classes… but dance was the thing people saw me do, and that’s what I got praise for – not my writing. So, writing was the thing I kept to myself up until now. It wasn’t by choice, though, or an easy transition. It was sort of beautifully forced onto me.
Up until December 2019, I had studied dance and choreography. I went to a magnet school for dance in middle school, a performing arts conservatory for high school, and then went on to get my bachelor’s degree in dance performance. Once I finished college, I moved to Los Angeles to dance in music videos, commercials, and movies – which is what I did until 2011, when the movie I was dancing in (Rock Of Ages) was located in Miami for production. At that time, I was eager to start bringing the secret stories I was writing to the stage, so I stayed in Miami (cultivating a lot of performance art and dance theater at the time) and started my own all-femme dance theater company. And that’s what I did and planned to continue to do until the day I died.
But then both of my meniscus tore while performing (my right in Dec 2019 and my Left in October 2022), and I found myself enduring four knee surgeries over the next three years… which was when I leaned back into my secret passion that had always been there… writing. It wasn’t easy to take myself seriously or have the confidence to sit with an editor or consider myself worthy of publishing. But then, after some honest growing pains, coupled with grief… I let go, allowed myself to believe in myself, and gave myself permission to say to myself and the world… yeah I can dance, but I’m also a writer.
What particular routines or rituals help you stay focused during your writing process?
Morning. Mornings are my ritual time. I wake myself up early, around 5 AM, so I can first do my wake-up routine. Water, coffee, toast, make the bed, look at the sky, and do something for my body (sometimes it’s yoga, pole, or just as many squats as possible – but I have to move my body to really wake up). Then, I light my candles and set a mood.
Sometimes I need silence, sometimes I need music, and sometimes I need a whole movie playing (because my mind sometimes does better with other people talking in the background). But once I do what I need to do, I start to write for at least three hours. Sometimes, I’m flowing; sometimes, I’m editing, and sometimes, I’m just sketching notes or exploring a character’s development. But I give myself those three hours (at least). And I like the morning because it’s quiet and I can be unbothered or distracted.
Of course, I’m human, and sometimes I just feel the need to lay in bed and think about life… but for me, I’m also learning that doing that can also be considered work and part of the writing process.
Your new book is called REBEL IN VENUS. How would you describe your book’s main theme or message?
At its core, it’s a story about the power of friendship and how (when we allow it to) it can heal us and even reveal the truth to us about ourselves. Then there are also themes of mental health, trauma, and suicide… which, when I knew these were going to be the driving themes of telling this story… that’s when I knew that queer identity also had to be a theme in Layla’s story. I felt this was important because depression and suicide are statistically high in the queer community… however (and I say this as a gay person who actively treats their trauma and depression), ‘being gay’ is not the mental health challenge or the thing that needs treating. And so that was also a driving theme in telling Layla’s story through ‘Rebel In Venus.’
What was the inspiration behind the book? Were there any specific experiences or events that influenced its creation?
On Jan 1, 2020, my best friend passed away to suicide, and one of the things she said in her note was, “I don’t want to be a burden to my friends” – and that never left me. I was dealing with so much at that time: my knee surgeries, the pandemic… then my best friend was just gone, and I had her dog. So I had this little reminder of her with me every day (Waffle, who also recently passed away), and I just wanted to (or more like needed to) write a book that would make her – if she would have read it – feel like a hero, and not a burden.
I think a lot of people (myself included) feel ashamed for having depression, anxiety, and trauma… these things are incredibly nuanced and difficult to navigate, and knowing you’re going to navigate it for a lifetime, it’s like this little part of you is saying: there is something wrong you, and you have to fix it. So I also wanted to write about this hero’s journey, where it’s not about magically freeing yourself from said depression; instead it’s learning to live with it, it’s learning how to choose to create joy with it, and it’s learning about the strength in vulnerability.
Also (and this might be a spoiler alert), I wanted to write an ending that I wished would have happened with my friend who I’d lost. But knowing that isn’t possible, my bigger hope is that someone reads ‘Rebel In Venus’ and sees themself in it. And if they were thinking about it… maybe instead, they dial 988 that night or a friend.
Were there any specific literary influences that have shaped your writing style or approach?
So for writing, and who inspired me most with this book specifically… for sure Audre Lorde and her approach to a bio mythography, but also her boldness and fearless honesty. Also Chuck Palahniuk. I really like his way of writing comedy, drama, and tragedy. I think ‘Rebel In Venus’ is a blend of both Audre Lorde – as far as a bio mythography, sort-of sprinkled with prose and poetry, as well as her themes on feminism and queerness. And definitely Palahniuk as far as his use of humor, tragedy, drama, and sort of dark sarcasm. The two of them were absolutely on my shelf and in my brain while writing ‘Rebel In Venus.’
How important do you think the role of research is in your writing? Can you share any interesting research experiences related to your book?
This book was me writing what I know, but I also wanted to be intentional and specific.
For my reference research for Miami – I drove around a lot and felt the sights, sounds, and smells – so they could influence the details that I use to describe the city in the story and paint a specific version of Miami that is more from the perspective of someone born and raised there, rather than a place that’s usually described solely as a party, and vacation destination.
And then there were the song lyrics and music artists that I referenced in the book – because it’s Layla’s way of dissociating during moments of trauma; it’s how she makes herself feel safe. Also, curating each song helped to define time in the book, so some of it was me remembering the top ten of 2002, but also picking a song that helped move the story forward or further highlight what Layla is feeling. I liked that part – it was like choreography for me but through writing.
I liked that part – it was like choreography for me but through writing.
Marissa Alma Nick
The other part of the research was my own experience with trauma and PTSD therapy, but also reading the book “The Body Keeps The Score.” That book was really informative and helpful to me, but it was an academic read. Yet, honestly, it inspired me a lot. I wanted to write a story about everything I learned in therapy and what I was reading about. Yet, I wanted to create a more visceral experience for the reader. I wanted them to really feel Layla not only experiencing her trauma but how she stored it in her body and experienced it throughout her adult life.
What challenges did you face while writing this book, and how did you overcome them?
Believing in myself and the story I wrote.
People only ever knew me as a dancer and choreographer, never a writer. So, at first, I believed that I could even be audacious enough to call myself a writer, and then I did submit the book to a few publishers – though it was my first time submitting, and I don’t even think I made the submissions right – but anyways, one rejected my submission for publishing, and I never heard back from the others. So, I had to take a chance on myself by deciding to self-publish. Not easy. It’s like learning on the go; it can be humbling and taxing on the ego.
To overcome my self-doubt, awful inner critique, and other people saying no to me and my book, I really had to get quiet and decide to do this, despite the odds or anyone else’s thoughts. I had to bet on myself. For that, it helped to surround myself with good and honest friends, ones I trusted enough to ask for help when needed.
As a writer, I got an editor, which I suggest, and not just a good one, but one that you vibe with because it’s like a partnership. When all of that failed, I focused on the intention behind writing the book and allowed something bigger than me to drive me. I imagined someone reading my book that maybe really needed to and connecting with them through the thing that I wrote.
So, I guess I’m saying I even allowed it to be personal, imagining just one person reading my book. Someone that just…it moved and impacted them. Imagining them while writing was also motivating when I needed it
Are there any particular scenes or chapters in your book that hold personal significance to you? If so, could you elaborate on why?
Chapter 30- “Kinks For Cash,” I wrote this character, Selma, who was entirely inspired by my best friend who passed away to suicide. I really wanted to capture her incredibly unique personality that really just wrote itself. She was that magical. I still love reading that chapter the most; it makes me miss her so damn much, but also, it’s so vivid, so it helps me remember her best parts.
Writing that chapter, too, was very cathartic as well.
As LGBTQ+ authors, we owe it to ourselves to dig deeper, be more honest, and write about the whole human experience of being gay so that readers who aren’t necessarily gay themselves can be transported into an experience they wouldn’t otherwise know.
Marissa Alma Nick
How important is it for LGBTQ+ authors to share their stories and perspectives with a wider audience?
Incredibly. Otherwise, the picture that is painted is one-dimensional and incredibly dehumanizing.
Even heroic and beautiful coming-out stories – aren’t ever black and white. They’re nuanced and messy and a one-of-a-kind rollercoaster. Sometimes, they’re not even heroic. Sometimes, they’re villainous and full of internalized homophobia. Sometimes they’re just a bunch of horny gay teens. Honestly, as LGBTQ+ authors, we owe it to ourselves to dig deeper, be more honest, and write about the whole human experience of being gay so that readers who aren’t necessarily gay themselves can be transported into an experience they wouldn’t otherwise know. And more importantly see a gay person as whole, as human, not as some mythical unworldly perfect creature or an awkward best friend.
We owe it to our own people, too, to read about people like them, who are whole, human, multi-dimensional, and interesting – just like all the other straight characters in books.
What common misconceptions or stigmas surround women’s mental health, and how can your book help challenge or dispel them?
I have a lot to say about this, so I’ll try to be concise.
Historically, women were sent to an institution if we acted out emotionally toward our husbands or family or were seen as smart enough to have a job and have “women feelings,” and still in 2023 – almost 2024 – a woman in a business office can’t comfortably cry in front of anyone, because others (sometimes including other women) will see her as weak, and unstable. Also, we barely have science on our side.
Women’s bodies have not been studied medically to the capacity of the male body (to this day), and that stigma keeps us from having up-to-date scientific information to better understand and navigate our body’s level of hormones and even our individual and unique menstrual cycles. There is so much shame around all of it, our bodies and our emotions, and still, according to lawmakers, women are deemed hysterical when showing emotions and, therefore, can’t make an emotionally sound decision about their own bodies. As women, it’s like we’ve been gaslighted to believe it’s all our fault or something is wrong with us. And that’s the scary downfall: when we believe that, and feel like that, and internalize that shame around our bodies and emotions, our mental health severely suffers.
So, I truly do hope that my book, which is pretty much about two women being incredibly vulnerable, challenges all of these misguided assumptions about women and our mental health.
What was the most rewarding part of writing this book for you personally?
Releasing some of my own internalized shame and connecting with people who read the book and feel seen. And given what the book is about, it’s vulnerable so witnessing other people be equally vulnerable is really entirely reciprocal and inspiring.
What do you hope readers will gain from reading your book? Is there a specific impact or emotional response you want to evoke?
I hope that those who read the book and recognize themselves in it feel supported, safe, and curious about themselves in a new way, but I also want people who don’t suffer from depression to understand better what it’s like for someone to live with it.
I want people to talk about suicide because not talking about it is making it worse for everyone. Also, I absolutely think most American girls and women (straight or gay) will relate to at least one or two of Layla’s stories in this book, and that’s an unfortunate truth. But that’s the point: the more #metoo moments we have, especially the more benign ones (because they all count, they all matter), the more we do that, the more we take away the mystique and power of rape culture.
So even if you’re not a woman, or you’ve had a more privileged life, or if you’re a straight white dude – I want people who can’t directly relate to Layla (or her best friend Maria) to read ‘Rebel In Venus’ and be transported into a world they never considered, and develop empathy that they didn’t know was missing.
Would you like to share any upcoming projects or plans with your readers?
I’m currently on a book tour for ‘Rebel In Venus,’ and working on optioning it into a movie or limited series. And I’ve finally started my second book. I have no set release date yet because I’ve only just begun about a month ago, but I am writing a second book. Something very different from ‘Rebel In Venus,’ it’s a murder mystery, actually – but also continues to explore themes of mental health, friendship, women, and queerness.
What advice would you give aspiring writers?
If you really want to do it, do it, and don’t let anyone’s ‘no’s’ stop you. Remember that rejection is okay – it is not failure – it is simply one of at least one billion other opinions available to you in the world, so you can all handle a few no’s; we were built strong.
Self-publishing is very accessible, and you can fund it on Kickstarter (or something like that) because where there is a will, there’s a way. And if you do go the independent route, copyright your work and, if you can, invest in your marketing plan. If you don’t have a marketing plan, make one. Because having a book means you now have a business, so treat it like such. Take your time, and don’t rush. Rushing doesn’t make you better. It just means you rushed and probably had a lot of unnecessary anxiety and, of course, get an editor.
Last, know what you want from your writing and really think about it. Are you an academic writer, a poet, a journalist, a novelist – screenplays, stageplay? Maybe you don’t know yet but think about it so you also know what direction you want your writing to take you or start to take you. Maybe you change your mind along the way. But create direction for yourself. And it won’t be easy. Nothing ever is (let’s be honest), so just don’t give up or let anyone tell you it is impossible. It is possible. It will be so hard but do it – you can. And don’t let something hard stop you.
Marissa, your story serves as a compelling reminder that within the pages of a book, we discover a realm of inspiration, introspection, and boundless possibilities. I want to thank you for taking the time to do this interview and eagerly anticipate witnessing your ongoing literary journey.